Like many women who discover they are facing challenges with their fertility, CF tried multiple infertility treatments, investing precious time and money to make her dreams of a family come true.
“I got married in 2017 and soon after we started trying to conceive,” said CF. “After a while, we were struggling and realized we needed to investigate what was happening with our fertility.”
Infertility affects many men and women. In couples that struggle with fertility, it’s important for both men and women to be tested. According to statistics from RESOLVE, one-third of infertility cases are female factor, one-third are male factor, and one-third are either both or undetermined.
CF continued: “I was told by the specialists at a fertility clinic that I had a blocked fallopian tube, and was also facing diminished ovarian reserve. That’s where there are fewer eggs, and in my case, they were also more fragile. I also had an endometrial polyp that needed to be removed.
“We had a lot of bumps in the road. We tried regular IVF first. In the first cycle, none of the eggs were developing at the rate that the specialists were expecting. The cycle was cancelled. We tried again. This time, one of the follicles had some pre-mature growth, so that cycle was also cancelled. On the third cycle, they were able to retrieve 6 eggs – all of them were too fragile, and sadly not viable. I received that news Christmas morning. With every cycle, my eggs were getting worse. My spirits were really low.”
“A friend from Church suggested I switch IVF clinics. I was also seeing an acupuncturist and she had worked at the same clinic my friend recommended. At that point, with multiple people recommending them, I switched. The specialist at this new clinic recommended that I have a second surgery to disconnect one of my fallopian tubes to ensure there was no risk of complications if I were to get pregnant and remove another endometrial polyp.
“After one more cycle with my own eggs, we were able to get one embryo, but it didn’t survive. It was a tough conversation, but the specialist recommended that I consider using an egg donor.
“This was not an easy decision. I worried about carrying a child that wasn’t biologically mine. Would I be able to accept the idea of this baby as my child? Would we bond? How would I feel after he or she would be born?
I had never heard of any of my friends doing this, and those I did talk to were surprised that this was an option. Many of them had never heard any of the terms we were using. For those that can get pregnant naturally, this seemed so new to them.
Through another good friend, I was introduced to a woman who was going through a parallel experience, though initially she was researching embryo adoption. What I realized at this point was that so many women go through these struggles, and it’s important to have a way to talk about it. We became really good friends through this.
It was this friend that recommended Fairfax EggBank since her clinic was already affiliated with them, and ultimately she chose to go the route of using an egg donor as well.”
Many women face multiple barriers with fertility. While CF’s story is something that happens often, not many women or couples are comfortable sharing what they are going through. When she was searching for information online, one of the things that CF said was reassuring was when she found stories like hers.
To help other women and couples get the information and support they need, CF agreed to share her story with Chosen Infertility, an online platform that hosts monthly online meetings on wide ranging topics that affect fertility. The recording of the meeting can be heard on their website.
CF’s friend recommended Catherine at Fairfax EggBank.
“My clinic wasn’t originally a partner with Fairfax EggBank, and with COVID, their donor program wasn’t going to be reliable. We went through the process with Catherine at Fairfax EggBank, and it was so streamlined compared to what we were facing with the in-house donor program where we were going to have to coordinate with the donor’s travel, hotel stay, the cycle, and then there was the risk that she might not have any eggs that were viable.
“Choosing to use frozen donor eggs eliminated all of that and Catherine made what has been the most difficult decision of my life something easy to get through. We were able to move forward with a donor we liked. We were really comfortable with her from her essays, and her background was similar to mine, I just felt really connected to her. Catherine was with us every step of the way. She helped us with so much information that we knew we had made the right decision.”
In February 2021, CF’s daughter Laila was born. She and her husband have additional embryos for when they want to begin adding to their beautiful family.
Fairfax EggBank is a leader in advanced techniques for frozen donor eggs for fertility. Our commitment to donor quality and service excellence makes us a premier, yet cost-effective, solution for intended parents. We work closely with all of our donor egg recipients through each stage of the process, and is a proud supporter of the LGBTQ+ community.
Our Egg Donor Database showcases one of the largest repositories for frozen donor eggs in the United States.
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